CORAL SPRINGS, FL–I recently changed the tag line of this blog from Passionate Enlightenment to Attainable Enlightenment.

Passionate seemed too ambiguous–too vague. Does it mean sensual? Out-flowing? Active? Obsessive?

Attainable is much more direct and meaningful.

Where I differ from most spiritual teachers, and thus this blog differs, is that I believe most teachers are not focused enough on what keeps their students from waking up (the Problem) and how to help them overcome the this. (more…)

PALM BAY, FL–After you wake up, eventually you will have to deal with your family. Unlike modern enlightenment fairy tales which say life will be all bliss and harmony, you will have to deal with your family members who, understandably, will be trying to figure you out, understand just what the hell happened to you, and quite possibly, determine where they went wrong in your upbringing.

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PALM BAY, FL–I don’t know why I had such a hard time getting this meditation out–either I’d screw up the sound quality or I’d over explain the instructions–but I finally got it right. This is the meditation that I used to stabilize my “enlightenment consciousness” during those precarious three weeks of my awakening. I first mentioned it the September 21st entry, Waking Yourself Up. Part IV: The Practice.

You can download the meditation here.

SILVER RIVER STATE PARK, OUTSIDE OCALA, FL–I’ve made and uploaded a new video today. Shot from inside a canoe as I drifted down the Silver River outside Ocala, FL. Another example of the one-take-push-record-talk-push-stop technique complete with all the expected unexpected interruptions of real life. Sadly, I didn’t capsize or knock the camera into the water as that would have sent the video soaring up the YouTube viewer ratings. Oh well, maybe next time.

Enjoy and have a wonderful Holiday!

SILVER RIVER STATE PARK, OUTSIDE OCALA, FL–Before I woke up, one of the things that I thought I understood was the sense of Oneness. To the mind, when you drop all boundaries, you become one with everything. The logic goes something like this:

• Boundaries only exist in the mind.
• Thus all boundaries are artificial.
• Without boundaries, everything is one.
• Thus you are one with everything.
• Thus you are everything.

To the students of non-dualism (buddhism, taoism, zen, yoga, et all), this makes perfect sense. There really is no table–the mind just categorizes some “awareness stuff” as “table” and some other awareness stuff as “not table.”

Oneness therefore makes perfect sense to the student and the thought of separation is considered as just an illusion.

This is all fine and dandy until the student puts his non-existent coffee cup too close to the non-existent table edge and the non-existent scalding coffee burns his non-existent groin off. And of course the searing pain he feels as he jumps up and down is all just non-existent pain too.

Once I woke up though, I started to feel what is meant by Oneness, and the feel is nothing like what they babble on and on about in the non-dual schools and forums.

After waking up, boundaries still exist–objects still have boundaries–but oddly, I seem to have lost all my boundaries. For instance, when I look at my hands, they seem to exist inside of me.

From the level of the Enlightenment of Oneness, your body seems to exist inside of you. In fact, everything feels like it exists inside you. Everything feels like it is you. And, because everything feels like it is you, it’s almost as if you don’t exist at all.

So forget thinking about what Oneness is–here’s how Oneness feels…

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HENDERSON BEACH STATE PARK, DESTIN, FL–The clouds, filling the sky, thankfully block the direct rays of sunlight–for the sand is so white that the light’s reflection would surely blind.

An emerald green sea gently rolls in, its rhythm like a beating heart that the tiny sandpipers sense as they dodge in and out–just above the gentle surf–searching for tell-tale signs of hidden crustaceans.

The sand crunches underfoot and a sudden quiver of appreciation runs up my spine as the seagulls float silently upon the air–separate, yet one with the wind.

GUM SPRINGS CAMPGROUND, OUTSIDE WINNFIELD, LA–I’ve added a new video, Dropping the Personal Self, to the Videos page. It provides a technique for seeing and distancing yourself from the sucky personal self.

Enjoy.

GUM SPRINGS CAMPGROUND, OUTSIDE WINNFIELD, LA–My Why You Suck post was designed to be funny, but my following points are serious.

Separate You from your personal self. Your goal isn’t to accept your personal self, it is to separate You from your personal self. Separate You from you (capital Y from little y).

It’s not about making your personal life better. It’s not about checking items off the previous list, “Oh, that’s not my problem.” It’s about seeing how the personal self sucks–and just as importantly–how it may suck in the future. It’s not about fixing your personal self, it’s about transcending it.

Feeling, not thinking. It’s not about thinking how it sucks, but feeling how it sucks. The more you feel it emotionally, the more easily you can identify it, separate from it, and drop it.

Seeing it and touching it. Most importantly, it is about touching the personal self. Touch it, pull away, touch it, pull away. Like touching the table, pulling away, touching the table, pulling away. The more often you consciously touch it (by seeing it and feeling it) the easier it will be to realize that you are not it.

Once you distance yourself from the personal self, once you separate from it, once you see it for what it is–a thought gone awry– then you’ll drop through the Hourglass of Enlightenment and never suffer from the pain of the personal self again.

December 16, 2009 5:56 PM: Added a video, Dropping the Personal Self, to the videos page (Wayne).

GUM SPRINGS CAMPGROUND, OUTSIDE WINNFIELD, LA–My belief is that the easiest way to wake up is to:

1. See and experience how wonderful enlightenment feels.
2. See how the illusion of a Personal Self sucks (see below).
3. Naturally drop the sucky Personal Self because you’re sick of it.

Read the full article here…

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GUM SPRINGS CAMPGROUND, OUTSIDE WINNFIELD, LA–I’ve uploaded a new video: The Hourglass of Enlightenment. This is the second (of three total) where I have been interrupted by the vocals of some animal. The first, in What is (and isn’t) Enlightenment, I thought I heard a kitten meowing out in the woods. In this one, I don’t know what it was: a huge frog, a loud duck, Big Foot? I dunno.

Anyway, enjoy.

LINCOLN PARISH PARK, RUSTON, LA–The store is full of shoppers–anxiety and desperation etching their features as they push their way through the crowded aisles while the sound of sweet Christmas carols waft from the overhead speakers.

Back at camp, the squirrels, fluffy and fat, spend their time burying nuts for the winter as the cry of a lone crow drifts across the still lake.

LAKE CATHERINE STATE PARK, AR–I’ve added a new page to the blog for videos that I create during my travels. One reason that I’ve been camped at Lake Catherine for so long is that I wanted to shoot a couple videos before I head to South Florida for the holidays (and the campground is empty, and it’s cheap with the winter rates). Ok, three reasons.

Anyway, check out the videos. Aside from the opening and closing credits, all are un-edited first takes (Hike out to the woods, push the RECORD button, talk, push STOP, hike back). I figured they’d be good practice for when I start giving talks (probably right after the holidays).

Enjoy.

LAKE CATHERINE STATE PARK, AR–A big change in the way I now experience life–versus before I woke up–is how I feel about my past. Memories no longer feel personal. This is due to dropping the Ego Story–the story which consists mostly of past, personal memories.

I still have personal memories, and I still consider them my personal story, it is just that I no longer consider myself to be that story. That is a huge difference–and is a key to waking up.

A bully humiliating me. Catching a girlfriend cheating on me. The feeling of failure when I decided to declare bankruptcy. Each of these memories has the same feeling–has the same emotional impact–as thinking of a kangaroo. A kangaroo. No negative emotional impact whatsoever. None.

On the other hand, good memories–my first kiss, gatherings with my family, hanging out with friends–all are infused with love. Ironically, it is not a personal feeling of love, not a self-centered love, but what you could call, pure, radiant love. Not a pulling, grasping, needy, fearful, wanting love–just a warm outward flowing love, like the warmth felt from a fire on a cold night. In fact, almost all my memories are infused with that love–even the memory of loading the washing machine a few minutes ago.

Indeed, I can look at that bully, I can look at that cheating girlfriend, I can look at that Wayne Wirs who felt he failed–all with love. Past their story, past their actions, is their pure, life force. There is a love within each and every person struggling to radiate out. Struggling to be heard and felt and recognized. If you look closely, you can “see” it–see this Light and Love within everyone and everything.

Behind all our stories, we are the same. Light is Light is Light. It is the personal story–a simple mental concept gone awry–that bends the Light. The personal story bends and blocks and filters the Light towards good actions, bad actions, or–and usually–actions somewhere in between.

LAKE CATHERINE STATE PARK, AR–I wonder if everyone who wakes up to their enlightenment has to tangle with trials in the form of temptations? Buddha had the temptations of Mara, Christ had to deal with offers from the Devil, and it seems that, in literature, every hero’s journey is fraught with trials on the return home.

Over the last few weeks I have had to deal with the lure of sex on the West Coast, the promise of wealth and stability while camped in the desert and, in the last few days, the call of freedom while here in the forests of Arkansas.

Each temptation has pulled at my mind and emotions, drawing me away. Tempting me away from what some deeper wisdom seems to know is my purpose: To share what I know of enlightenment.

Each temptation came from a friend. Each friend wanted something of me, and in each instance, I was tempted–and I wavered. Ultimately though, I turned away from the temptation, explained my reasons in detailed honesty, and continued on.

In each case my mind said, “What they offer is a great idea,” whether it was no-stings-attached sex, financial stability, or the sale of my RV (to purchase a smaller, go-anywhere rig). Each time a part of me yelled, “Do it!” But each temptation felt dark. My friends, the people offering these deals, didn’t feel dark, but what they offered did. Each offer, if accepted, would pull me away from what I was “meant” to do. Each offer would have “led me astray” by adding more complications, more work, and more energy diverted.

So in each situation, I had to close a door on a friend. Not on my friendship with them, just on their offer.

But here’s the wonderful thing about closing doors: When faced with a closed door, as you turn around, you’ll find that the entire world stands before you with open arms, beckoning.

I know in the first two cases, one friend turned that re-directed energy into finishing the writing of her stalled books. Another re-directed his energy into learning to code and maintain the software we had worked on. Everyone lost, but everyone gained. Such is the nature of Life–no matter how difficult it at first seems, Life always has a way of finding its balance.

With my third friend, it is too early to tell, but hopefully she will turn and find that the entire world awaits her also.

LAKE CATHERINE STATE PARK, AR–From most of the trees, the leaves have fallen away–their purpose finished, their husks discarded. The low, harsh sun of yesterday has crawled behind the subdued clouds and a soft, diffused light rests upon the fields and country roads. There is a sense of stillness here, mixed with a long awaited anticipation as if the earth, like a frail grandmother, was preparing to blow out the sputtering candles on an ancient birthday cake.