LAKE CATHERINE STATE PARK, AR–A big change in the way I now experience life–versus before I woke up–is how I feel about my past. Memories no longer feel personal. This is due to dropping the Ego Story–the story which consists mostly of past, personal memories.
I still have personal memories, and I still consider them my personal story, it is just that I no longer consider myself to be that story. That is a huge difference–and is a key to waking up.
A bully humiliating me. Catching a girlfriend cheating on me. The feeling of failure when I decided to declare bankruptcy. Each of these memories has the same feeling–has the same emotional impact–as thinking of a kangaroo. A kangaroo. No negative emotional impact whatsoever. None.
On the other hand, good memories–my first kiss, gatherings with my family, hanging out with friends–all are infused with love. Ironically, it is not a personal feeling of love, not a self-centered love, but what you could call, pure, radiant love. Not a pulling, grasping, needy, fearful, wanting love–just a warm outward flowing love, like the warmth felt from a fire on a cold night. In fact, almost all my memories are infused with that love–even the memory of loading the washing machine a few minutes ago.
Indeed, I can look at that bully, I can look at that cheating girlfriend, I can look at that Wayne Wirs who felt he failed–all with love. Past their story, past their actions, is their pure, life force. There is a love within each and every person struggling to radiate out. Struggling to be heard and felt and recognized. If you look closely, you can “see” it–see this Light and Love within everyone and everything.
Behind all our stories, we are the same. Light is Light is Light. It is the personal story–a simple mental concept gone awry–that bends the Light. The personal story bends and blocks and filters the Light towards good actions, bad actions, or–and usually–actions somewhere in between.
It's Time To Wake Up
Mystical Oneness and the Nine Aspects of Being is a step-by-step guide to enlightenment and beyond.
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