PALM BAY, FL–In an email conversation with a very knowledgeable spiritual seeker, I commented to him on how profound it was for me to “empty my cup.” This simple surrender led directly to my waking up. “Emptying your cup” is a phrase from a famous Zen story–a version of it can be found here.

I’ve included the key portion of the my email (edited slightly) below the break (huh?).

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PALM BAY, FL–I don’t want anyone to think that I’ve fully integrated this enlightenment thing yet. I’m still tumbling down the mountain, but I feel it coming to an end, so I guess it could be more accurate to say I’m sliding on my butt down the wet grass of the foothills, occasionally hitting a pile of sharp, hidden rocks which remind me I’m still not fully yielding to Her will and intentions.

One of the lessons I’ve learned recently is that, as the Borg liked to say, Resistance is futile.

More below the break (huh?).

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I often receive emails along the lines, “How can I fix myself?” They never say it in those words, but that’s the gist. “I don’t feel the bliss, how do I get that?” “I’m not happy. How do I find happiness?” My answer below the break (huh?).

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PALM BAY, FL–One of the popular approaches to enlightenment today is the path of inquiry. I have a serious problem with this, as most students of it, once they “figure it out,” believe themselves to be awake, when really all they are doing is fooling themselves.

If you don’t feel it, if you don’t feel the Beauty, the Wonder, the Passion, the Light, yes, even the Divine, in you, as you, and around you… then you simply aren’t there yet.

Below is an email from a man who recognizes that he is trapped in a nondual quagmire…

I so badly just want some peace. A loving sense of presence that reassures this body/mind that everything is alright just the way it is. That things are neither wrong nor right… bad or good, that they just are, and as that there is just perfection.

I have read “Sailor Bob”, “John Wheeler”, “Gilbert Schultz”, I had a phone conversation with “Charlie Hayes”, I have met “Byron Katie” at a seminar. My favorite book so far was Perfect Brilliant Stillness by David Carse. I understand there is no personal me… no separate entity. What I am is that presence, that awareness that is knowing all of this. There is only just the one and everything is a manifestation within that.

So why cannot I see through the illusion? Why cannot I see through the separate self? Can it ever happen, can I have any influence towards this?

I know, I know… I, I, I. There is no I to have any influence over anything. I am already that! Jeeze, I am exhausted and yet I cannot stop the seeking. I feel like I am being pulled towards this by a invisible Tractor Beam that won’t let me go, but also won’t let me see through the illusion.

Is there a different way I can approach this? Any ideas you might have would be greatly appreciated. I appreciate your “story”, and your pilgrimage to find answers.

My reply below the break.

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PALM BAY, FL–Recently one of the things that has really surprised me is how much time, energy and stress I used to put into protecting and “improving” myself and my life. A “self” and “life” that were ultimately just figments of my imagination.

You see, before I woke up, almost all my time was spent on making my life better: Smarter, wealthier, wiser, more comfortable, happier, etc. It was spent on winning.

Almost all my energy was spent on trying not to lose.

When the personal self falls way and the ego barrier crumbles, the inside (the former you) merges with the outside (Her/the Universe) and you profoundly realize that You-As-Nothing and She-As-Everything are the exact same thing. You find that you have nothing to lose because 1) as Nothing, you never had anything, and 2) as Everything you have nothing that is lacking.

But what is not readily apparent is that the energy formerly spent on defenses and betterment, gradually transforms into a deep-felt sense of joy and happiness and–most powerfully of all–appreciation.

Experiment! Play!

So even if you haven’t “woken up” yet, why not experiment with it? Why not play with this awhile–for an hour, a day, a week–and see if you really have anything to lose?

Stop defending. Stop trying to improve. Forget about the best deal, the best you can be. Just kick-back and say, “You know, this is just fine with me.”

A life lived in this manner feels open and alive and amazing. It feels like harmony. Play with it, try it out, see for yourself if it isn’t worth the loss–the loss of the ego barrier running you ragged.

PALM BAY, FL–Yesterday, at my brother’s, I was trying to explain the relationship between us and She (he calls Her “God”). At the time, I was doing a very poor job of it. We put the question aside and got down to far more serious matters which involved killing alien invaders on Halo Reach, but later last night as I was driving home, a much clearer analogy came to me. More below the break (huh?).

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PALM BAY, FL–And now for something completely different…

I usually get requests for spiritual guidance or advice from my Wisdom For Alms offer, but yesterday I received one on, basically, creativity.

Sandy was looking for advice on finding a niche, online market that would keep her interest while providing income.

My reply (below the break (huh?)) may be of use to anyone looking for a business idea, hobby, or project that they will feel passionate about.

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PALM BAY, FL–One of the most difficult concepts I have getting across is what I mean by “She” or “Her.” People often misunderstand what I mean when I talk about “Her,” and this is completely my fault. I’m just too inept to describe Her properly. More below the break (huh?).

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PALM BAY, FL–Enlightenment is like a mountain top. In your search for it, you have to climb and climb, dropping excess baggage as you attain higher altitudes. Once you reach the peak, you are “carrying” nothing. What isn’t talked about much though, is that in order to function in the “world of illusion” (the “normal” world), you have to come back down the mountain. For the last year, I have been tumbling and falling down it, getting scraped and bruised as I went. Poetic maybe, but it really makes a lot of sense. More below the break (huh?).

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JACKSONVILLE, FL–I’ve been driving for about ten hours a day for the last six days so I’m pretty beat. I expect to arrive in Palm Bay tomorrow–but then you never know. The photo above is of the St. Louis Gateway Arch. Pretty impressive if you’ve never seen it.