Humble. Compassionate. Kind. Loving.

A Tiny Tree In A Large Forest

A Tiny Tree In A Large Forest

FLAGSTAFF, AZ—To wake up, you must transcend the ego. One in a million can do this by accident, but for the rest of us, we must weaken the ego first.

As I inferred over on this NonAbusers blog post today, weakening the ego makes us humbler, kinder and more understanding.

Wonderful traits.

But we’ll never gain them by thinking about them.

The ego is humbled by failure. The ego is weakened by mistakes.

Live in Mystical Oneness. Put yourself to the test. Fail at it time and time again.

Make your mistakes, be called out as a hypocrite, screw up and be embarrassed (feel the ego resisting?).

Every time you fail (“experience runs deep“), you will grow more humblecompassionatekind, and loving in the process.

Humble. Compassionate. Kind. Loving.

These are not the traits of the ego. These are the traits of the Divine in us all.

Humble. Compassionate. Kind. Loving.

To feel these—to live these—aren’t they worth a little embarrassment?

The smart have their books—the wise have their scars.

Eroding The Ego

Soft Needles

Soft Needles

FLAGSTAFF, AZ—Though it is getting colder, I’m still in Flagstaff awaiting a couple of things: Some NonAbusers shirts and my vehicle registration. An odd feature of the nomadic life is that, while mail magically appears out of thin air for most, for nomads we have to go out of our way to receive it.

Everything has a cost, but as for everything of value, a little pain is worth it.

Here’s the thing: From what I can tell, a little pain is a requirement for any worthwhile growth, whether that growth is financial, emotional, mental, physical or spiritual.

I was exchanging emails the other day with a long-time reader (I’ll leave his name out as he doesn’t appear to mention it on his site) about how a personal blog—even an anonymous one—acts as an excellent tool for eroding the ego. Oddly enough, confessing your humanity publicly—confessing how you are pretty much like everyone else on the planet—is painful to the ego.

How odd is that? “I am a lot like everyone else and my ego hates it.”

Your ego wants you to be perfect, but, ironically, it won’t let you be perfect. Why? Because it is afraid of failing, so it does everything in its power to keep you from even trying.

As I recently found out, a lot of people are resistant to taking a simple vow to no longer intentionally harm others. This resistance boggled my mind, but as I discovered, this resistance is because their ego fears they will someday break the vow—that they will fail to be perfect.

This is the same reason why people talk about their spiritual beliefs, but don’t walk them: Their egos don’t want them to fail at living up to them.

If you want to weaken your ego, if you want to be closer to the Divine, if you want less of you and more of Her, … then you have to be willing to confront your ego head-on.

You have to be willing to fail.

For any serious growth to occur in your life, you ARE going to fail and it IS going to hurt.

But…

But you will also grow and thrive and reap all the benefits of living authentically. You will fail repeatedly, but you will also live true.

The smart man has books. The wise man has scars.

And I’ll take those scars any day of the week.

How To Dramatically Increase Your Luck

The Subtle Light of Life

The Subtle Light of Life

CAMP 3 (or 4), MT HOOD, OR—I came down off my mountain to hang out with Randy the Mobile Kodger for the afternoon. When I told him I’d been thinking of using the term luck instead of synchronicity he spontaneously slid into his Southern Baptist Preacher persona (which anyone who has been around Randy for more than five minutes is quite familiar with), and sang its praises.

Synchronicity is just another word for Luck. Good luck. Outstanding luck. Luck bordering on the magical.

From a consistent standpoint, I am the luckiest person I have ever met, and I know at least a dozen people who would agree with me.

I may not have won the lottery (yet), but I have consistently good luck. Outstanding luck. Magical luck.

Why? Because the less there is of the Wayne-thing, the more there is of the Divine-thing, and the Divine-thing has all sorts of resources at Her disposal.

So how do you dramatically increase your luck? How do you “get lucky” on a consistent basis?

  1. Live as if you never die. Research the evidence of the Soul and recognize there is zero evidence to the contrary. Then start living as if you live forever. Your ego (the State-Your-Name-thing) will take a serious hit—and that is a very good thing when it comes to getting lucky.
  2. Open to Radiance. Feel the natural Love you have for yourself, then open and allow that Love to flow outward onto others (people, plants, animals, rocks). Surrender to this Love and whatever naturally arises. Your ego will take another serious hit.
  3. Practice Emptiness. Dig out and drop everything your mind says is true about the personal self. The personal self (ego) is an illusion and it’s all in your head.

Do these practices one at a time or concurrently, but if you do them one at a time, then I strongly suggest you do them in the order above. Pretty soon, there will be far less of “you” in your life and a hell of a lot more of the Divine.

And the less there is of you, the more lucky you’ll get.

The Gateless Gate

There Is No Gate

There Is No Gate

MT HOOD, ORMichelle is standing right in front of the Gateless Gate. All she has to do is step through. I can’t pull her through, nor can I sneak around behind her and push her through. Why? Because the Gate (separation) doesn’t exist. It’s all in your head. It’s built by the ego.

It’s called the gateless gate (an imaginary barrier that seems very real) because once you experience the me (the Gate) as just a mental construct, you “look back” and see it was all in your head. It’s not there anymore.

When you do step through, you lose the ability to say who or what you are. If you look at the last line of what I wrote yesterday, about my mom confusing me and TaoGodHer, you’ll notice that in the same sentence I do the same damn thing! And I do this all the time.

I don’t know who or what I am anymore and this doesn’t bother me in the least. In fact, I think this is a perfectly natural attitude for people who’ve stepped through the Gate. There is simply no Me-thing. There’s a Wayne-thing, a contraction that functions in the world, but that doesn’t feel like me anymore… it feels like other.

Here’s what I wrote Michelle yesterday to try to help encourage her to step through the Gateless Gate. If you’re close to the Gate, if you too are on the edge of the Void, then I hope this helps:


This is very, very, let me say it one more time, very important:

If you can see it, then it isn’t You.

If you can see or experience it, then it isn’t the Real You.

Right? There have to be TWO things there, You and that which you see or experience.

Tolle said on his realization (me quoting from memory), “I realized I hated myself. Then I realized who is hating who? Are there two of me? Which one is the real me?”

See my video Mystical vs Non-Mystical Enlightenment around the 1:20 mark, as my fingers, representing my boundaries, snap and disappear.

Don’t get hung up on what you ARE, but focus on what you are not.

Don’t try to define what you are, you can’t. I can’t tell you what I am—I do know I’m not made of “ORs” (this thing or that thing), but “ANDs.” (You are in control of yourself, AND you’re not in control of yourself.)

You’re right there on the edge. The Gateless Gate is right in front of you.

Are you your thoughts? Are you your experiences? Are you your memories? Are you your emotions?

Or are you that which experiences these things?

Don’t just think on this. Feel it. Go into Radiance, pull away and drop anything that is “not You”… anything that you can see and experience.


PS: I apologize to anyone to whom I didn’t post a testimonial from. Though I read every comment and email, I often forget to save compliments to my Testimonials folder (which is where I assembled the page from)—must be that discomfort-with-compliments thing I mentioned. I’ll try to do better from now on as I plan on updating that page on a monthly basis (much like I update the Favorite Photos page every month).

The Ego Is Just A Bunch Of Thoughts

Lake Tahoe On A Windy Day

Lake Tahoe On A Windy Day

LAKE TAHOE, CA/NV—The final event which led to the dropping of my ego was sitting next to a frog (my Frog Master) and wondering how he could sit still for hours on end while sitting still for hours on end was driving me crazy.

This event led to the following:

I realized that thoughts weren’t real… and everything I knew about myself consisted of thoughts.

And that’s the gist and importance of the previous post.

What are you without your thoughts?

Bonus: The email exchange that started this thread, to which I am grateful…


(P___’s response to The Subtle Senses Of Self post.)

Fundamental sense of identity. Thanks for the list of definitions. Having read your posts for well over a year now I have a fairly decent grasp of what you’re pointing to when you talk about “radiance”, “emptiness” and the “soul level”. But it’s nice to have you clarify the terms.

I think your taxonomy is more complicated than it needs to be.

I grew up in the northeast US of A near the Hudson river – a major geographical landmark and commercial waterway. Other people live near the Potomac river, or the Mississippi river or the Nile – all great rivers, full of history, commerce and geographical significance.

Now – look at a full photograph of the Earth – a 3D globe is even better. There are oceans labeled the “Pacific”, the “Atlantic”, the “Indian Ocean”, etc. But it is also abundantly clear that there is just “One” body of water on our planet. The Earth is seventy-five percent covered with water – it’s all over the place. The Atlantic and Pacific oceans are connected – as are the Indian ocean and the Arctic ocean and the Red Sea and the Mediterranean. In fact it is wrong to think about them as being different, or separate seas that are somehow “connected”.

All the rivers all over the world and all the lakes and all the ponds are composed of the same water from the same great source. It is all “ONE” great body of water that is all over the place and we just arbitrarily name different areas of it with different names. There is no”connection” between them. There is no “them”. There is only the water – pure and simple.

And this is made crystal clear by just looking at a good map or a globe of the world. There is no logical deduction to be be made. You don’t have to “reason” this out. It is “slap you in the face” plainly obvious if you just take the time to look.

So it is with consciousness and our innate sense of self. The self that we all experience, the mind that inhabits all of us (and which we inhabit) is the GREAT MIND – the oceanic consciousness that envelopes our world – and likely the cosmos beyond. There is no other mind. We are not little bits of consciousness walking around trying to make connections with one another. We are all the same magical and mystical being but located at different spots and calling ourselves by different names – “I am the Hudson. Which river are you?” Hah!

I think it plays too well to our analytical, logical intellects to define different “levels” of selfhood. It makes the intellect/ego think it can reason or manipulate its way to oceanic awareness. “I’m almost there – just one more level to climb”.

You’re already there. There is no climbing or self-improvement to be done. We just have to stop mis-identifying ourselves with the limited, unique specifics of our lives.

PS – I agree that there is a “level” of realization beyond that of universal selfhood. Once you fully understand that you are the universe and the universe is you – it is possible to experience a form of consciousness (?) that leaves all traces of selfhood behind. You reference Adyashanti in this regard. I call it the “Realm of Isness” – my own particular wording for something that really can not be talked about. Naked reality? The ground floor of existence? That which simply IS?

Wishing you the best – P___

And keep on keepin’ on.


My blog post in response.


(P___’s response)

You are 100 percent correct. There is the naked, pure, absolute reality that is flooding our senses all of the time every day – and then there is the constant flow of abstract thoughts, images, memories, etc that we lay over the real world. We often confuse the real with the abstract.

They say there is an equator around our world. If I traveled south to its location I doubt that I would see it. Could I pick it up? I doubt it. There is a north pole on our world. What would I see if I traveled there?

At this moment, as I sit with a keyboard in front of me and gaze out the window at the trees beyond, I see the world that is before me at this moment – NOW. I hear the voice of my wife in the other room – NOW. I feel the chair beneath me – HERE and NOW. And I am part of everything that I experience. I see the world with MY eyes. I hear the world with MY ears. I am an integral, necessary. and inescapable part of all that I experience – and it can not be otherwise. So am I merely an extension of the world, or is the world merely an extension of me?

Maybe the world and I are extensions of each other. Where do I end and it begins?

I didn’t mean to confuse the real with the abstract. My use of the water/ocean metaphor was meant soley as a means of illustrating to the unenlightened how our sense of identity can be both particular and universal at the same time. But it was only meant as a metaphor.

Words are devilishly slippery things. I suppose its sometimes better to just be silent and let the world/nature speak for itself.

P___

Keep on keepin’ on


(My response)

I knew you’d get it P___. Wasn’t sure if it would offend you, but I knew you’d get what I was saying. 🙂

I am just as guilty (as I hope I made apparent in the post) of confusing thoughts/beliefs with truth. Thoughts are tenacious little bastards!

But as I pointed out in the comments, I hope people realize that I experience the flow between the different selves, the different lived experiences of self-contraction. What you and I were talking about was the Nondual, the Emptiness, the One without an other, and I was just experimenting to see how much was true (me as everything I perceived) and how much was belief (TaoGodHer as Everything). Doesn’t mean beliefs aren’t true, just life and thoughts become friendlier and more flowing when we can distinguish between beliefs and reality.

Anyway, I got a lot out of the post too, so thank-you! 🙂

Be well,

Wayne (Wirs)


(P___’s response)

I subscribe to your posts because it is very clear to me that you have “been there and done that” and are sincerely trying to bring others along the “pathless path”. I appreciate this greatly and hope that you continue.

I wish you the best. And thanks for taking the time to reply.

P___


END OF THREAD

Now go back to the top of this post and really contemplate it. What are you without your thoughts? – Don’t answer it, feel it.

Negative Reinforcement

Too Much Mind. Too Little Light.

Too Much Mind. Too Little Light.

FRESNO, CA—When it comes to spiritual development, I’m a big fan of negative reinforcement. If it sucks, you’ll tend to avoid it. So un-Buddhist of me I know, but it works (I’m not a Buddhist).

In this forum post, I respond to micherts comment about the analytical mind and how I use my dislike of the mind to strengthen the Love/Light in me.

Turns out, Thomas Merton might have been a fan of negative reinforcement too:

In humility is the greatest freedom. As long as you have to defend the imaginary self that you think is important, you lose your peace of heart. As soon as you compare that shadow with the shadows of other people, you lose all joy, because you have begun to trade in unrealities and there is no joy in things that do not exist.

-Thomas Merton

Volumes have been written about what Merton says in just three little sentences. Beautiful.

As long as you have to defend the imaginary self that you think is important, you lose your peace of heart.

In other words: If you keep defending your personal self (imaginary self), then your life is going to suck.

Bad dog! Bad! Drop that right now! You bad dog.

Negative reinforcement: Bad for dogs—good for you.

(All silliness aside, read those three sentences again. Powerful words.)

Between Self and No-Self

Frog Master Stand-In

Frog Master Stand-In Contemplates the Gateless Gate

WICKHAM CP, FL—For your next emotional roller coaster—and don’t kid yourself, there’s always one just around the corner—I present the following practice:

Imagine my Frog Master sitting on your shoulder for the next few days, seeing the exact same physical world as you are seeing.

Why is he not being affected by these events? Why is he so much better than you are at dealing with the world?

Keep this visualization in mind as you go through the next few days.

Now keep in mind, I’m not saying be like the Frog Master, I’m saying live the experience, suffer if that is what you feel, but ask yourself, “Why isn’t the damn Frog suffering?”

“Why are these events affecting me—why are they affecting everyone else here—but they’re not affecting him?”

I’m turning comments off on this post because this is not a lesson to be discussed or analyzed.

This exercise is designed to be lived and experienced.

It is designed to wake you up.

What Lies Behind

Frog on the Screen Porch

Frog on the Screen Porch

WICKHAM CP, FL

Hi Wayne,

Your writing continues to speak to my very being, as though I cannot utter a question with respect to enlightenment and my own journey without you answering it.

Thanks Again,

Nathaniel

My ego would love to take credit for the common, mystical trait (usually attributed to gurus), of saying just the right thing at just the right moment—but it has nothing to do with me and all to do with Her.

About my A Day in the Life of a Soul post, my mother said that it reflects exactly how I am, but I think what she was commenting on was the openness and allowing within me which really isn’t me but a relaxing of the “me.”

Modern science says that all these things we see and feel and hear are just patterns of a swirling energy—that, from a purely scientific viewpoint, there is only the Universe and all the individual parts are just an illusion of perception.

In the same manner, your intelligence, the inner “you” that does all the thinking and feeling and seeing must therefore also be an “illusion of perception” and that this swirling pattern of “you” (your inner sense of self) is just a part of a much more massive Intelligence (what I call “Her”).

She, this Intelligence, is the seed and the source and the core of “you”, but—just like glass bends and filters light—the illusion of perception (the ego, the sense of self) bends and distorts Her intelligence and comes out the other side as “you.”

Sunlight -> Glass -> Diffused light

She -> Sense of Self -> “You”

Nathaniel—though he may not have realized it—was commenting on Her actions, not mine.

My mother—though she may not have realized it—was commenting on the opening within me, not me-this-Wayne-thing.

Your body is the glass. Your sense of self is the dust coating it, and Her Light—which is bent and filtered through your sense of self—is “you.”

Don’t add more stuff to your sense of self. Don’t block Her Light. Don’t improve. Don’t be your roles or titles. Don’t blindly follow rules or dogma or teachings. Don’t cling or grasp or try to control. Don’t make yourself stronger. Don’t darken or bend Her awareness-through-you any more than you have to.

You don’t need to polish the glass, you don’t need to clean it. Just stop adding to it. Let the dust dry up and blow away on its own.

Surrender. Be open. Let go and allow.

The less there is of you, the more there is of Her.

Losing

Trash Can

BLUEWATER LAKE SP, NM—All authentic spiritual progress is based on losing.

When you live as a Soul, you don’t gain courage—you lose your Mortal identity and reveal your less frightened self.

When you live as Radiance, you don’t acquire a loving countenance—you lose the hardness of the ego which blocked your natural love in the first place.

When you live as Oneness, you don’t acquire psychic powers—you simply lose the separation from the All and hear the whispers of Truth more clearly.

Authentic spiritual development is not about gaining new qualities or abilities, it’s about losing.

It’s about losing the mental and conditioned barriers that have blocked your true nature, and simply revealing what has always been there in the first place.

On Writing Mystically

Florida State Bird

PALM BAY, FL–I’ve started to write. I’m not writing about what I thought I would. It doesn’t make sense to spend the time on this project when there seem to be more important things to write about, but ultimately, this is where She’s leading me.

What’s left of my ego barrier is telling me not to waste my time on it, not to focus on the mystical side of enlightenment, let alone on the benefits. The ego barrier is afraid I’ll get a reputation as a nut case.

I’m ignoring him (the ego barrier). He seems to be nothing but trouble these days.

From my perspective, “I” simply don’t matter any more. To my ego barrier, I’m the center of my world, but the barrier is just a pile of conditioning, something that I see (and sometimes lose myself in), but it’s no longer “me.”

The conflict I’m having with this project though–between conditioning and faith–is a perfect example of surrendering to Her: of relinquishing control, of ignoring the consequences, of releasing and riding with the Flow.

Ultimately this project is a low-risk one. If you want to play with surrender, I’d encourage you to try a similar low-risk endeavor–one where your mind says “Left” and your heart says “Right.” You may fail, you may end up with egg on your face… but, if you are ready, you may find yourself face-to-face with the Divine.

I believe I’ll be releasing this work online, a piece at a time. This isn’t the way a sane person would write–they’d do a rough draft, then revise it a few times, then release it–but then that doesn’t seem to be what She has in mind.